loss.

Life is too short. She was only 16! Why did she have to leave so soon. I didn't find out the day it happened. But I remember thinking about her that day. I had no idea I would never see her again. I'm so angry! Why do such innocent and undeserving people have to leave? Like my baby nephew. Why couldn't he live? Yeah life would have been a little bit more of a struggle for my brother, but I know it would have been worth it. I guess when i consider how corrupt the world is now..and how many horrible things he would have grown up into, I realize that maybe I should be happy that he had the privilege of skipping all of that. Is it selfish of me to wish they were still here? I just wanted to see her one more time and tell her that I hadn't forgotten about her, and talk about the good ol' days...and hold my little malcolm, and feel his little heartbeat, and tell him that I loved him at least once. It's been almost a year since we lost him. And two weeks since she's been gone. I don't think I can lose anyone else. I just hope that if anyone else has to go, that it's me. Is that okay?